LABOR? I HARDLY KNOW HER

Happy Labor Day or whatever.

So my parents just went out to go check out an SUV they will probably be buying, which means I'll have a new car to drive this week, finally. For those not in the know, our poor old Beautiful Truck was involved in an accident earlier this summer, crippling our transportation outlook.

It's a GMC Jimmy, I think a 2001 or a 2002. So it might look like this:

Although I'm not really sure. That's kind of big, isn't it? Oh well. At least it doesn't look like this:

Yep, that was our 1990 Ford Ranger. Four-speed MT. I'm going to miss manual transmission so hard. So tenderly.

Now I'm waiting for our single car to get home so I can go to Barnes & Noble and buy a thousand books for this terrible course on gothic literature that I stupidly signed up for. After that, it is Labor Day with the fam. The meat-eating fam.

Being a vegetarian sucks. Never do it, especially if you're the only person in your family who doesn't eat meat. Because my family meats it up almost exclusively, every holiday. And I'm stuck with the crappy vegetable left-overs and potato salad.

In between now and my hammy doom, I have to read all of Shakespeare's Hamlet (hurrr), which also sucks. My life is a thousand yards of inconvenience. I have no real legitimate reason to complain, yet I do it anyway because... man, I really just don't want to read Hamlet again. I can't even find my copy of it.

Now I might answer the tons of e-mails in my backlog, which you might be able to read about here. My writing is bland today for some reason, so I'm going to stop now.